New York coke slut Rosario Dawson seems to have given up on cocaine and taken up eating, because in these pictures her stomach is quickly catching up to her big tits. It’s not really her fault, she’s got Puerto Rican roots and all those Puerta Ricans end up fat and breast feeding their 15 babies. The truth is that I’ve been watching her career since she was 16 because I had a thing for seeing dudes fuck drugged up passed out girls with Aids and Kids was really the only movie at the time that delivered and to get to that part of the movie, I had to fast forward past Rosario Dawson’s underwear pool hopping scene. At least she’s got skinny legs.

I do like the fact that she’s hosing herself down like the hog that she is, but mainly because I have a thing for girls who shower, since my wife doesn’t and even if she tries, she either gets stuck or misses her crucial parts that need cleaning because she can’t reach, like her ass. It’s one of those you like what you don’t have situations.

Speaking of showers, I woke up today and saw that it was raining outside, so decided to take advantage and take a homeless shower, where you basically stand outside and thank god for giving you his natural water supply that is free and try your best to get as wet as possible because if you pull it off proper, you not only clean yourself but the clothes you are wearing, buying you a couple weeks of less stink. I also like to take advantage of peepin’ on the girls who get caught in a homeless shower unintentionally, and end up with wet shirts, hard nipples and make-up running all down their faces like they’ve been crying all day. It brings me joy.

Joy that big tits just don’t bring to me. They just aren’t enough to get excited over a chick in a bikini. I need more. Maybe I’m gay that could be why this post is hard to read and all over the fucking place, but I think that’s got more to do with my laziness to edit this shit.

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Nylon is some piece of shit, too cool for school magazine, that is supposed to be on the pulse of the art, music and fashion scene and pretty much fuels the hipsters, indy rockers and electro DJs i hate by telling them what’s cool and what they should be into for the moment in their quest of trying to be cool.
It’s these pretentious elitist club of rich kids and actors who have no idea what’s up but are trying to live this bullshit fashionista lifestyle because they are empty and I have a feeling that Mischa Barton is probably friends with one of the editors or some shit and agreed to do a photoshoot because she really isn’t doing much more with herself and because it gives her that stamp of approval cuz she thinks being in the Nylon club means that she’s cool.
I think the whole thing is a waste of fucking energy and people should be worried about more important things in life. Trying to stay on top of things so that you come across as cooler than fuckin’ God is totally the opposite of being cool, because as far as I am concerned being cool means not giving a fuck about pretty much anything and naked chicks.
That said, I guess that means that Mischa Barton is halfway cool, so that means she’s on her way to being cool, but doesn’t mean she made the cut. Keep on tryin’, you sloppy fucking whore.

One of my oldest and only readers was this depraved freakshow named HornyLohanWanker who would always beg for pictures of celebrities in red lipstick smoking cigarettes, it was his fetish, so whenever I see a bitch smoking with red lipstick on, I think of him and that’s part of the reason I did these Brittany Murphey pics. The other reason, is because the bitch is bending over and showing off her shitty ass in slutty heels. I guess I am a pervert, because the truth is that I kinda want to hate fuck this bitch, there’s something she said in an interveiw that left a bad taste in my mouth and that was when Ashton Kutcher broke her heart and ran off with a mom and he made a statement about his small penis. Now I am not an Ashton fan, and I am not surprised or offended that he’s got a small dick, I just hate when girls go out and try to make hateful statements about you just because you’re done fuckin’ them and they are hurting on the inside.

It’s like this time I was seeing a chick I worked with and she told all my friends and co-workers that I raped her, sure she wasn’t actually my girlfriend and I kinda stuck my dick in her at the office christmas party after slipping shit in her drink, but I still think what we shared was romance and it really hurt when the boss brought me in and told me to leave and never come back or the company would press criminal charges. Then there was a chick who told everyone that I beat her up, just because I punched her in the face and broke her nose, the last time I check a punch doesn’t count as beating up and she made it sound like I pinned her down and mangled her. I guess it’s also like the time every single girl I’ve banged told their friends how small my dick is, but I never held that against them, because they were just speaking the truth and not trying to drag my name through the mud like this Brittany Murphey cunt.

This Gina Lisa Lohink was on Heidi Klum hosted Germany’s Next Top Model and that’s the reason you have no idea who she is. She didn’t make it through to the finals, but ended up landing some kind of career working on a travel show but I guess the blow to her ego that she lost left her unsatisfied. German’s aren’t good losers, so she took the Paris Hilton school of fame by releasing a sex tape to become a household name.

So somewhere out there, a video of this bitch in PVC sucking off her boyfriend is floating around, I don’t have it, but I do have these nude pics of her. The truth is when I heard a German Next Top Model had a sex tape, I was expecting a little more than PVC wearing blowjobs, that shit is tame. I thought German’s were fucked up militant freaks who consider missionary position when you shove a loaded gun down each other’s throats, cuddling is when you shit on each other’s faces and doggy style meant gas chambering some Jews, Fags and Retards.

I just have a couple of the nude pics, they are good enough for a Friday.

Someone emailed me asking me if the fat Mexican in the background of this fat actress walking her dog picture was me. It isn’t, that isn’t what I look like and despite popular believe not all mexicans look the same, you racist fuck but more importantly, I wouldn’t let any evidence of me and Jennifer Love Hewitt together ever hit the internet because I’d hate to be seen in public with her. Not because I have a secret high profile celebrity relationship that I am trying to keep under wraps, but because she’s too fat to be considered a real celebrity and I have enough fat chicks in my life and swore that I’d never get into that kind of mess again.

I don’t know what went wrong in Demi Moore’s womb, like maybe she’s got really bad genes or maybe her and Bruce Willis didn’t know they were pregnant for a few months of this bitch’s development and were railing experimental drugs that only celebrities get, or maybe she actually got raped and impregnated by an Alien abduction becuase there’s no evidence saying that’s totally impossible, and if you ask me this is kinda proof that it could happen and that the government slipped up in trying to slide this shit under the carpet so the general public doesn’t freak out, but I do know that she’s fucking ugly.

I don’t know how someone could go through life looking like this, it’s one of those situations where you’d never want to leave the house if this was you, but since she’s a rich kid and probably spoiled to shit, she just doesn’t realize that she’s fucking offensive to look at.

She probably thinks she’s some kind of gift to the world and on the same level as all the other celebrity kids, and looks down at all the commoner and pretty much spits in our face by wearing lowcut dresses like she’s got the right to leave her house and show off her barely there tits, but since I’ve decided to look at the brighter side of life, and not the demons that are her face, I guess she did us a favor by given us something less abusive to look at when she makes an appearance, maybe next time she’ll really pull through and throw a mask on while men jerk off on her naked bodies, because girls this ugly are really on acceptable in fetish porn, cuz hot chicks are too uptight to get experimental. Bitches.

Jennifer Aniston’s nipples are always hard, I remember that shit being the only reason I watched Friends, or thought that she was hot in any way. But today’s hard nipple is different and not a hard nipple of happiness but a hard nipple of desperation. It stems from the news that the love of her life and ex-husband, Brad Pitt, who wouldn’t get her pregnant, has just given birth to not 1 but 2 babies with another woman.

You know that as she cries on the inside, the only baby cries she hears are the ones in her broken reams and her nipple is feeling that pain and it slowly puts itself out there in some kind of hormonal reaction to the news, just hoping there was a baby of its own to feed, but no matter how hard it looks or tries, it won’t find one, becaue there isn’t one.

Here is Vagina About Town, Jordan/ Katie Price, showing off her titty scars. I’d rip into her for hiring a shitty plastic surgeon, but I heard when you mangle your tits beyond recognition by getting tons of operations to make them so unnaturally big, even a cartoonist at Disney can’t get ‘er done without leaving some eraser marks and you know what kind of perverts those Disney people are.

I guess all this is to say that I heard she was downsizing her tits, but shit still looks fucking big and disgusting, maybe I am just saying that because I hate fake tits, or maybe it’s because I am distracted by that aged monster of a face that keeps giving me sex eyes, like my friend’s horny mom used to do to me when I was 13 and I don’t quite no how to deal with it.

I thought that I was the only one who lost interest and moved on from Jailbait Disney immigrant lookin’ pussy after I saw it in nude pictures, but it turned out the rest of the world did too because she’s been pretty much no where to be found.

I heard there’s a High School Musical 3 in the works, so I am guessing the producers are still getting into her, but that’s just beause Ashley Tisdale reminds them too much of their Jew wives, while Miley Cyrus’ ego and success has made her less ambitious on making them cum with her mouth, while Vanessa Hudgens is holding on as hard as she can to the dream and is willing to do whatever it takes to not have the producers go through with their threats of firing her.

Here she is in some staged bikini pictures with her “boyfriend” to help prove they are real wholesome Disney couple, and decided to have her mount Effron like a good little virgin who only dry fucks you til your dick falls off, because they felt the negative press of these kids being inappropriate didn’t outweigh the struggle they are having to prove Effron’s not Faggot, because Gay teen heart throbs are bad for business. When all the little girls realize they are being lied to and that the Effron fantasy won’t ever come true because they don’t have a penis and that will lead to them realizing that all the Disney dudes who sing and dance all light on their feet are also poofters and they won’t buy tickets to the movies, any of the merch or even cut out posters of the heathen from Teen Beat, to hang above their bed because their minister told them that homos are a product of Satan.

On a side note, I heard it took them 3 weeks to cooridinate this shoot because they couldn’t seem to get all the cock out of Effron’s mouth, but that could just be rumors.

Jodie Marsh proves that a drunk chick in tight clothes, with big tis hanging out all over the place like they are looking for a good time, while playfully flirting with some other ugly chick, doesn’t have to be hot to be worth fucking. These girls look like garbage failed pornstars who are well past their prime, but remind me of the time I almost scored a threesome. The story is pretty simple, I was at a bar drinking with some trashy busted up chick, who looked and smelled like her teeth were rotting. I figured she was easy pickings.

We got to talking about how she loves being naked with her friends, a thought that was only hot in theory and asked her about threesomes and lesbianism and shit like that, next thing I know the bar is closing and I get invited back to her hotel room that she is sharing with her friend to drink their mini-bar and do some shitty cocaine to keep the party going. After settling in with these 2 busted up chicks. I keep trying to drink them into something hot knowing that the situation outweighs the quality of the pussy, I decide to push for them to kiss and show each other their tits. I guess I was too eager and they weren’t really having it and asked me to leave because they were tired, but before I did, I jerked off in the bathroom to the thought of the threesome that could have been. It was a pretty humilating night but pretty much counts as a threesome in my books and that’s the end of my story.

Here’s Jodie Marsh and her tits.