Celine Dion is a hero where I live, shes the French Canadian who made it into the big leagues, a local talent who doesn’t live at home or do much for home, because she peaced the first chance she got, but knowing she is from the same shitty poverty low class roots as them keeps them going as they drive their compact 20 year old car to the local chicken restaurant they work at.

Like all French girls I know, other than my wife, who obviously has some kind of genetic disorder that I didn’t know about when I married her, she looks worth fucking in her bikini. For some reason, French chicks don’t really get fat no matter how badly they eat, they just always have these slim bodies that eventually start hanging off their bones in some kind of slim-fat aging mess, but when dressed shit looks pretty tight. I guess my idea of french girls is a little biased, since the only ones I know are career strippers who rock the pole, chain smoke and eat french fries and gravy, french toast, french salad dressing and drink excessively while jacked on coke.

The only exciting thing I know about French girls is their passion and love for getting fucked anally on the first date, they are pretty open to sex and laid back about the shit, meaning you don’t have to promise to take them to a subtitled movie so you can both enjoy it. They are low maintenance, and don’t expect flowers or jewelry, you just have to bring her a chocolate bar and promise to pay for the aborition if you knock her up and bitch is naked.

It’s also socially acceptable to fuck at 14 and legal for 50 year olds to fuck 14 year olds, it’s a cultural thing you’d probably appreciate, but that’s just because the young girls won’t judge your small penis because compared to the 14 year cock they’ve been getting, yours is average sized.

I heard that Celine Dion’s husband was her married neighbor when she was growing up and who slammed her when she was 14 and his wife was at church, before dude mortgaged his house to record her first album and make them all rich and making her father not run dude over with his snowplow.

BONUS - SOME MORE OF HER IN A ONE-PIECE

Read more at: http://www.drunkenstepfather.com/index.php/2008/07/10/celine-dion-is-hot-in-a-bikini-of-the-day/.